I’m having a conversation with a clinician who wants to start her own private practice. She says she wants to start a practice and has tried in the past and it didn’t go so well for her. I was really impressed with her vulnerability and honesty I must say.
As I was listening to her, I understood that:
- She has done her numbers and they looked good (so good in fact I was like, why aren’t you doing this already).
- She has a following, a captive market of people who already buy from her numbering > 800 (why isn’t she doing this yet?)
- She is working so hard in her agency, she loves her clients but really, she is working simply too hard.
Now I was in one of those headspaces where I wasn’t being a good coach, and wanted to serve this delightful person so I set about giving her heap of to-do’s that she could do right now that would see more client’s coming to her. She kept interrupting me – I mean how rude, after all I was helping her (geesh, see even I get it wrong sometimes).
Then I stopped talking and let her speak.
I heard all sorts of discussions about feeling and being scared. I get that. I know fear, many of us do. But what I didn’t hear was an intention to act in spite of fear. In fact, what I heard was
I can’t do anything until I don’t feel afraid anymore.
Being afraid is a normal part of life. We actually face fear every single day – anyone crossed a street today? Anyone drive a car today? Anyone said no to someone today?
We face fear every single day, but we don’t often feel fearful because we’ve come to expect a sense of fear, and we know that it can’t hurt us or stop us from doing what needs to be done.
Now this is not permission to be reckless, foolish and do stupid things that you should be scared of. Fear has its place, it protects us. Thank you fear.
But sometimes it can limit us. Especially when its unjustified, unknown and un-resourceful.
If your goal is to be fear free before you act then I’m really sorry, feeling no fear is the wrong goal.
It is much more useful to learn how to act while being afraid. And there are some simple things you can learn to help you do this:
- Learn what your personal risks and triggers are to feeling afraid? For some people it’s a lack of security, others a lack of certainty, or a lack of significance. Work out what this is for you, what is really being triggered here?
- Ask for help! Ask someone to help you gain perspective as to what is really going on and to support you through taking action despite the fear.
- Write down all the things you have done before while feeling afraid. You will see it’s a big list! I’m assuming if you are reading this then there was no real disastrous outcome to you acting while experiencing some fear.
- Acknowledge fear as being real, and wanting to help you be safe. Then help fear know it’s not going to limit you, and it can hang around if it wants, but you are going to act anyway.
- Act and Celebrate. This now one step closer to taking action in your business, in your life that will become as effortless as crossing a street.
And as Susan Jeffers Says – “Feel the fear and do it any way”.
Here’s to your success!